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How to Calm Irrational Fears for the Anxious Preschool Mom

August 9, 2017
Anxious preschool mom

*This post is featured on the Moments of Hope Link Up with Lori at Searching for Moments. I’m so honored and grateful to be featured on this beautiful hope-filled link up party!

There are just a few more weeks left of summer in our household. I know many families are already starting back to school this week or next week. But for us, we have a little more time before our oldest daughter heads off to preschool. It’s wonderful to have an extended summer, to squeeze in a few more carefree sunny days, but it’s also a bit unsettling. Because this momma is trying to mentally and emotionally prepare for the start of preschool.

I never knew how easily I was prone to anxiety until I had children. I find myself worrying about their safety, panicking when I momentarily lose them on the playground and playing out in my head all the worse case scenarios that could possibly happen to them in every situation. Nervousness surfaces in my heart when they are with another caretaker and I’m not there to keep an eye on them.

It is affording me an opportunity to trust, to let go and let God. Click To Tweet

Most of the time, my fear relates to the unknown. I don’t know what is going to happen, I can’t control everything going on, I can’t picture the environment my kids will be in, I don’t have a visual on them, or we are entering a new situation that is unfamiliar. The unknown is what makes situations more frightening, even though it is often a very irrational fear that is all in my imagination.

I realize that very often I mother in fear.

The feelings of fear and anxiety are a difficult pattern to break and sending my oldest off to school for the very first time is giving me a chance to test the extent of my nerve-wracking emotions.

It is affording me an opportunity to TRUST, to let go and let God.

Starting school in an unknown territory and a transition for a stay at home mom with children who have never attended daycare or other programs without me being there.  The anxiety that keeps popping up in my head throughout the day and making me restless when I’m trying to sleep at night is all in my IMAGINATION. I can tell myself that but emotions often don’t want to cooperate with logic.

My head knows that worrying about all the terrible things that could possibly happen to my children when I’m not with them does not change anything.  I can’t change the future by worrying. And it is very unlikely that anything terrible will happen to them just because I am not there. But, nevertheless, my mind continues to be terrified of all the “what ifs” and the “unknowns”. So here are three things I am trying to do lay my irrational fears to rest.

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How to Calm Irrational Fears For the Anxious Preschool Mom

When Anxiety Comes, Pray

Ever since I registered my daughter for preschool in the spring, I’ve been praying a daily prayer for her success in studies. I’ve also been praying for protection for all my children. Both prayers are found in this Mothers’ Manual: Prayers and Directives for Mothers and Expectant Mothers“.

I love this scripture verse as a reminder to not give into fear:  “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” John 14:27. I have it on a sticky note in my home office to help me cultivate a calm attitude.

'Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.' John 14:27. Click To Tweet

For the month of August, the blog To Jesus Sincerely is doing a virtue challenge on fortitude or courage. There was a section on fear that really spoke to my anxious heart.

“Let go of irrational fear. We all have fears that are overblown or don’t make sense[…..]Maybe it’s the worries that keep you up all night[……]We can’t always change our circumstances.  We can’t rid the world of spiders, snakes, worries, or error.  But we can always have courage to do the right thing.  Let go of your irrational fears.  Give them to God, and then step out in action to right wrongs and clear your house and your head of those nasty creepy crawlies.”

Learn From the Experienced

Throughout this summer,  I have asked the more experienced friends of mine who have older children or who at least started on the journey of preschool a year ago, all the questions that are spurring my anxiety. Even though some of my concerns just seem completely ridiculous, they are still affecting my emotional mindset. They are REAl fears even if I know they are irrational and unnecessary.

To the young and single people I know

Some of the questions I’ve been asking:

How did your kids adjust to school?

How was it for the younger siblings being left behind at home?

Are your kids frightened when you leave them at school?

Do you worry about your kids being safe when they are away from you?

How did you deal with the transition emotionally?

Have your kids ever gotten lost or wandered off at school?

How do they react with the structure of school?

Is it hard for your kids to sit still and follow the rules?

Facebook groups and my local moms’ group have been great outlets for me in learning about the experiences of others and being reassured that my worries are most likely needless. It is comforting, on the other hand, to know that other moms have gone through anxieties and transitions similar to mine.

Hearing the experiences and feelings of other moms reminds me that attending school is a normal part of growing up for many families.  Once our family transitions to the school life, it will become familiar and normal for us too.

Prepare For a Positive Year

Worry weighs on the mind and breeds negativity while optimism lifts the spirit and breeds positivity. Planning mentally, emotionally and physically for the school transition is helpful for my nerves and for my mindset.

Finding ways to be excited about school and seeing my daughter’s eagerness to attend preschool are also essential for refocusing my fearful attitude about this new season of life. I’ve been adding fun ideas to my “School Days” Pinterest Board and browsing resources to help me have a positive outlook towards the school year.

Worry weighs on the mind and breeds negativity while optimism lifts the spirit and breeds positivity. Click To Tweet

Here are some of the parenting and scheduling resources that I’m looking forward to utilizing as we approach the start of our family’s school life.

  • A Realistic Action Plan For the Weary Mom: 15 Days of Hope From The Intentional Mom by Jennifer Roskamp ($7.99)
  • If Only They’d Told Me: All The Things You Wish You’d Been Told About Pregnancy, Parenting & Relationships by Natalie Cutler-Welsh ($6.00)
  • Parenting in Tough Times by Luschka van Onselen ($6.75)
  • 7 Key Tips to Save Yourself from a Bad Day (Or Life) by Ruthie Gray ($25.00)
  • Back to School Planner 2017-18 by Laura Rizer ($4.00)
  • Student Planner by Jolanthe Erb ($16.00)
  • Fairies Complete Routine Chart Set by Samantha Jockel ($6.00)
  • Creating A Schedule That Works: Your Life, Your Schedule by Marlene Griffith ($10.00)

All of these resources are part of the Super Parenting Bundle which consists of 80 parenting digital resources for one reasonable price of $47.00. There are toddler activities, craft ideas, homeschooling resources, special needs materials, chore charts, back to school planners and more.

Another great thing about this bundle is that there is a no-risk, 30-day happiness guarantee. If you really don’t like the resources, you can get your money back no questions asked.
If you are like me and want to embrace the new school year with hope and positivity then don’t miss this sale! With the right resources and the right mindset, we can all have an awesome year.

Lay those irrational fears aside and become a joyful preschool mom with a positive mindset. I know that’s what I’m going to try my best to be.

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Philippians 4:8

  • What a beautifully positive post that helps parents relax a bit.

    • Thank you so much 🙂 I hope it is helpful to someone 🙂

  • I don’t have kids yet but I can imagine that this is difficult!

    • Yes, it’s a huge transition, or at least it feels that way.

  • thesophiadiaries

    great points for sure! I love that in life, you just gotta learn from those with the experience, no matter what the problem is <3

    • Thanks, it’s so helpful to have experienced friends!

  • I so needed to read this! My kids start school next week and I’m definitely feeling anxious. Thanks for the helpful tips!

    • You are welcome, this is as much for myself as it is for my readers 🙂

  • Julie Loos

    I don’t think you ever lose that mommy anxiety and my oldest is a junior this year in high school. The parenting bundle looks great!
    Visiting from #MomentsofHope

    • That’s comforting to know on some level, haha. Thanks for visiting!

  • Shell

    Sharing this with one of my cousins with littles about to start preschool…

    • Awesome, thanks for sharing. I think all parents are in the same boat when it comes to starting school 🙂

  • Rebekah

    We homeschool, but I still feel anxiety when I leave the boys with a new sitter or they go to a new Sunday School class. My favorite tip that you mentioned was praying over our children, that is so important!!

    • Yes, anytime they are out of eye sight is worrisome! Prayer is sometimes the only thing that keeps me calm 🙂

  • Marisa

    I never knew how much I was prone to anxiety until I had kids either! We homeschool, but I still find plenty of things to be anxious and fearful about. A verse that has really helped me during those times is Colossians 1:17 which says, “He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.” I don’t have to worry since Jesus is in control!

    • That is a great quote to remember Marisa!

  • Stephenie White Gamache

    The hardest thing to do is let go of our babies. I have a 10th grader, 6th grader and 5th grader this year and I will still sniffle and worry when they get dropped off at school. Thank you for sharing this touching post in the All for Mamas Link Party Week 12 #allformamas. I will share your post on the FB group page #All For Mamas, my FB page Blended Life Happy Wife, pinterest, google + twitter and stumbleupon . Stephenie = Blended Life Happy Wife

    • I guess mothers are always going to worry about their kids, it’s just part of our nature. Thanks for sharing 🙂

  • This couldn’t have come at a more perfect time with school starting up! My favorite reminder from you is “let go of irrational fear.” I just seem to worry all the time about my children’s well-being and making sure everything is all right with them. But I have to learn to just let God handle it.Thank you for sharing!

    • You are so right! I’m glad you found it helpful!

  • Skye Lea SN

    I just put my second kid in preschool this year, and letting her go was much easier than with the first kid! lol 🙂

    • Yeah I’m sure it will be that way for me too 🙂

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  • Hi Hannah,

    Such an honest and beautiful post filled with so much HOPE! Thank you so much for sharing it at #MomentsofHope ♥ I’m honored to share it as my featured post for this week’s link-up!

    Praying for your sweet Mama’s heart as you send your little treasure off to school!

    Blessings and smiles,

    • Thank you so much Lori. I have reall y enjoyed following your blog and participating in the link up! We start school on Monday and my daughter is soooo excited so that definitely makes it easier 🙂

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